If you belong to the type of woman who love too much and can not and live for a minute without a man, then it seems that you are dependent on relationships. The same can be applied to men. A story is recalled about a minister who, at all meetings, looked with his eyes at his wife to get her an approving look.
Having read the book of Norwood Robin “Women who love too much,” you will be able to disassemble in detail those reasons that ruin many beautiful and successful women who choose to be companions in the life of completely unsuitable men.
In the meantime, listen to the advice of psychologists for those who love too much.
What is the dependence on relationships?
There is no need to panic and immediately rush into generalizations: each of us experienced moments of love in his life, into which the symptoms of love dependence showed themselves, but it is called being in love, especially at the beginning of the relationship.
True dependence on relationships, when it reaches its highest stage, is truly devastating – both for the victim and for the dependent.
This is a behavior where love and sex are not used to meet normal life needs, but usually to reduce their suffering. A person, in this case, uses love or sex as a drug that helps him feel better. This is a symptom of the complexities associated with the relationship with another person, but also with oneself.
A person suffering from dependence on relationships has no more pride of his own, nor adequate self-esteem.
For example, one young man suffered from such dependence for 10 years: it was enough for him to hear disapproval from his boss, as this complex was immediately manifested. At any cost, he needed to spend the evening with a woman, for this purpose he kept a notebook with addresses of ladies who could call and make an appointment.
He used sex in order to reduce his suffering. At a stage when a person is ill, he absolutely needs to find someone to no longer feel pain, and he is ready to give his love (or its likeness) to people with whom he has not exchanged a word before.
If this happened to you, then you go through different stages
Fear of being alone, low self-esteem, an inverted view of things and suppression of one’s own ego can lead to the fact that you become addicted to another person.
Another person is perceived not as a person, but as an object that can satisfy your anxieties and fears. Dependent on the relationship is not able to hear another person, see it and understand what it really is.
Sometimes people are so afraid to be alone, that they are ready to maintain a relationship at any cost and practically with anyone.
How to react?
For those of you who think that your partner is for you – as a drug, it’s time to consult a psychologist.
Luckily, love addiction is not a disease. Most often, such an attitude is inherent in people who did not have sufficient experience of relationships, for them the absence of a partner is like a fear of death.
Thus, if you feel the need for approving evaluation from others, more often than necessary – it’s not scary. There are different ways to suppress your anxiety – from going to the movies before shopping.
But if everything has gone so far that you can not physically survive for a second without another person, do not drag on – go immediately to a therapist.
He will teach you how to change your behavior, and how to learn to love yourself a little more.